Friday, June 22, 2012

A Revelation

I can't believe its taken me five years of marriage to figure this out. And the saddest part? I figured it out in a semi-sleep deprived state, two weeks after giving birth to my second child.

I have this routine in the middle of the night when I wake up and Dan's snoring/heavy breathing is annoying me. I turn over and in this order hope that his snoring will end.
#1. Give him a death glare
#2. Gently tell him to stop snoring
#3. (Now completely annoyed) I hiss, STOP IT!

Dan's response (in this order)
#1. Sniff his nose
#2. Gently lift himself up and reposition himself in the exact same spot (and continues snoring)
#3. Tells me, "I'm not snoring"
#4.  Huffs and turns over

Now, I'm wondering if anyone can see a problem with this (other than the fact that it doesn't work)? The problem lies with me. In my initial response to Dan's snoring. I'm giving the death glare to someone whose eyes are shut. He can't see me! I don't know why I haven't figured this out before. And why every night I get more and more annoyed that my death glare doesn't work. Yep! I'm not the smartest tool in the shed. But at least I figured it out before I killed him!

Footnote: Do you know what the worst part of all of this is? After figuring out that he can't see me when I give him the death glare, I still do it! Every night since I have given him the death glare while he snores away. You think I would figure it out or something!

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